TLC is definitely not letting me down today.First, Say Yes to the Dress marathon, and not because I'm obsessed with getting married. I am, however, obsessed with people who are obsessed with getting married. The tears! The anger! The strangely hysterical high when they find the right dress!
Then, my first encounter with Extreme Couponing. Who are these people? They spend a minimum of 30 hours a week clipping coupons in order to add to their miniature supermarket basements full of bizarrely useless items.
One lady had over $4,000 diapers. And no babies. No kids, for that matter. She did, however ring up $1,200 dollars worth of groceries that she paid two dollars for. Oh, it's remarkable for sure. But what about the carpal tunnel in your scissor hand? What about the 300 boxes of cereal you have stacked in your bedroom? What does that do to your sex life?
Actually, after watching these people, it probably enhances it.
But probably most importantly, what about the fact that all of the food you just got for free is terrible for you? They say, "It's impossible to find coupons on meat or milk or produce. I don't buy anything full price."
You sick, fascinating person, you.
Then, there was Hoarders which needs no explanation. Sheer horror. Pure entertainment.
And finally, finally, High Stakes Sweepers. Super friendly people obviously high on Sweepstakes crack winning cars, vacations, beanbag chairs, and thousands upon thousands of dollars in straight-up checks.
Their idea of fun is taking their kids around the neighborhood on recycling day to take the caps off of Coke bottles. "People are throwing away winning opportunities!" one lady said. "We often win more pop, but then we get more bottle caps!" The circle of life, ladies and gentlemen.
Oh, and before you judge me too harshly, you should know that I definitively turned off the There's Something About Pipa special that came on midday.
She's attractive, she's royalty, and she exhibits no obvious psychotic behavior.
No thanks, TLC.
